please let me run away.



today was ass. i swear i went delusional. i could have cried during the exams.

no, actually, im not fine.
but its so easy to lie. so much so that i start believing myself.

the one hour bus ride home just made it worse. so i got home & turned up the tv & laughed so hard just to hear myself laugh again. then i couldnt take it, so i brought my dog down & ran with her. but she just wouldnt run with me so i brought her back up after 2 rounds.

& then i went down to run for 25 minutes, 3.6 km. but i didnt want to go back upstairs, so i walked & walked & walked. & then i went back up.

& now here i am. about to cry my heart out.

& i dont know why.